first impressions

***SPOILER***

Serious post ahead

***SPOILER***

A lot is to be said for first impressions. Dad always says you never have a second chance to make a good first impression. To an extent, I believe him. To a smaller extent, I tend to apply this in my life; life is too short to spend a lot of time on people and things and places you don't have a good feeling about from the word go.

When I first visited Oxford in October 2006 I said I could live here. That is me liking a place. I loved it in all its prettiness and green and old buildings and feeling of wisdom. I now love it, for all of the above and more, but when I moved here to work in January 2008 I wasn't that thrilled about leaving Bristol. I found it hard to settle in Oxford and what kept me going was that first impression, the memory of that feeling of having once thought I'd be able to call Oxford home (that and very long daily phone calls with dear friends!).

Sometimes though, first impressions start on the other end... dislike. For me, when that happens the natural tendency is to turn elsewhere and keep going. Yes, you may be missing out on great and lovely people, but that's part of life too - choices! You choose other great and lovely people and things and places you connect with instantly. Simple, as far as I'm concerned.

Occasionally, some of these less sweet (keeping it mild, people, keeping it mild!) first impressions of people and things slip through the net and you're faced with having to change your mind... oh dear! When do you lose that initial gut feeling and warm to them? When do you welcome them in? When (if ever) do you let go and invest in it? I don't know. Do you? And I wish I knew. For I'm finding it hard to let go, believe I may actually like this... and enjoy the ride! Because you see, on top of believing in first impressions, I also hold on to things. We nostalgic people, do that. And that makes it so much harder to leave first impressions behind... So I guess I do know... Life is about choices in the end, and I choose what I believe in.